Why Do We Need to Grow Up?

Hayden began Kindergarten this week and ever since I caught a gilmpse of his classroom, I have been wondering why we need to grow up? I guess I am more curious about why we are expected to be SO boring. I am not a boring person. As a matter if fact, I am quite exciting; some might say fascinating. But, because I am a " grown up" , I am expected to be boring.
I teach high school students and even they do not get to have that much fun. I do not see why we can't have circle time or sit around cracking up over the word underwear. Some underwear is very funny; ie. 3xl thong ( Picture it. On a hairy dude. Funny, right?) Really I just want a huge, brightly colored rug. There is one in Hayden's classroom and frankly, I want it. I want to put it in my classroom and dance on it ( Yesterday, I did twirl in a circle until a student could come up with an answer..I got relly dizzy, but it worked). Or use it to put my kids in groups. They would love it. They could still learn curriculum AND enjoy themselves.I know they enjoy my self-penned " Cheating Song", as well as my singing voice:-)
And snack time. Who does not love a snack? Who does not NEED a snack come mid-afternoon? We should all get snack time. A few Teddygrahams and a drink. Some fruit snacks. Perhaps some pretzels. I think it would make a few people I know a bit less grumpy. Afterall, one cannot function if their belly is rumbling. Some of my students eat at 10:36 ( yes, 36) in the morning. Of course they are starving my the time they reach me at the end of the day. I think that is why that boy ate all of the wood off his pencil yesterday.
Let's talk recess. Persnally, I need recess. I'd like to play jacks. Or, better yet, CHINESE jacks. Some days, I could use dodge ball. There are a few people I'd love to chuck a ball at ( their heads). Picture everyone you work with going outside to play for 30 minutes. It would be fabulous.
Most importantly, I want a bathroom in my classroom. This is a serious matter. As an avid water drinker, I frequently need use the bathroom. As a teacher, this doesn't work. If I leave my kids unattened they might start having sex ( ok, so they have grown up a bit.) I have to wait until class exchanges or lunch to go. Yesterday, I made the mad dash to the pot-tay at least 5 times, Each was a close call. Look, I am coming off of summer and have what is known an an untrained bladder. All summer long, I could go as I pleased, I went willy-nilly whenever I felt the urge ( pun intened). Now, because I am a grown up, I have to wait. And wait. If I had a bathroom in my room, things would go so much better...for me and my bladder.
Mostly, I just think we need to be able to laugh, alot. So, as my favorite six year old would say, "Pineapple, Underpants, Poopy, Poopy. HAHAHA".

One Down

Everyone keeps asking me if I am ready for Hayden to go to Kindergarten. The answer, umm, YES! It means he is a cool six year old. Long gone are the baby abd toddler days that I did not really love, or like, at all. I love " big " kids. Not so much little kids.
People seem to expect me to be emotional and nostalgic. " Aww, my baby is so big" kind of crap. That really isn't me. I want him to go out in the world, be kind to others, laugh, and perhaps learn a few things. ( other than the sarcasm I am teaching him at home).
I will say that this is a milestone for us. Right after Hayden was born, one of my best friends sent me a quiz. It was one of the copy and paste quizzes that you send on to your friends. The point was to reveal things about yourself that your friends might not know. One of the questions was, " I'd like to see...". Most people entered exotic locales and fabulous travel destinations. My response came quite easily to me and I immediately typed, " Hayden go to Kindergarten, Hayden's Bar Mitzvah, Hayden graduate and Hayden get married." At the time, those were things I wanted for him, but was not really sure we'd see. Oddly, I have remembered that quiz over the years and can't help but think of it, again, as he approaches the start of school. For us this is a milestone. We fought, hard, to get here. Hayden leading the fight all the way. Amazing as always.
So, one milestone down, three to go. I hope to type this same blog entry seven years from now on the eve of his Bar Mitzvah. I also hope that I have a great dress to wear. Oh, and fabulous shoes.