Kicked to the Curb

More and more lately, I am being kicked to the curb. Hayden wants to be with Rob. He looks forward to " Fellas' Night". He wants to have Rob do the countdown to get out of the tub race. Rob should read to him at night.
Just last night, they were playing football while watching football and the ball was passed to me. Hayden quickly turned and said, " Mom, we are trying to play a game here." ( Well, excuuuuuuse me.) I am just in the way.
They do just fine without me. I spent the weekend at the beach with the Canal Run girls and didn't hear a peep from them unless I called to check in.
It got me thinking about new and exciting ways to get some " me time". ( Leaving the country?) The more I thought about a whirlwind excursion, the more I also thought about my house and all of he things that would go "wrong" ( yes, wrong is in the eye of the beholder) if I were not there.
I have complied a short list:
1. No food would be purchased from the grocery store.
2. Strange noodle/ hot sauce/ranch dressing pastas would be cooked and consumed.
3. Meds would go undrawn.
4. Beds would never be made.
5. Laundry piles would rival Mt. Everest.
6. The washer would have laundry left in it causing mold to grow and a foul stench to overtake the basement.
7. Cheese would be an acceptable vegetable ( YES, I am calling you out. Plus, what kid likes reduced fat cheddar sticks???).
8. The shower curtain would remain open ( UGH).
9. Bills would go unpaid resulting in no electricity, gas, cable and evetually foreclosure and and a vist from the repo man.
10. All doctor/dental appts. would be missed. If not missed, arrival at such appts. would be so late that the appt. time would have passed and no one will be seen. ( Can we say gingivitis?)
11. Pots would remain on the dish rack, out in the open for all to see.
12. People would eat, food, in the family room ( a HUGE no no).
13. Balls would be thrown in the house.
14. Navy and black would be paired together.
15. Rock Band and Punch Out would take the place of reading and counting.
Basically, they'd turn my home into a Frat house. They'd probably even wear togas ( mostly because the laundry would go undone and sheets would be the only clean item in the house).
Guess I can't plan my getaway any time soon. And they will just have to get used to me being in the way .